Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Deployment Three...

In a month, my Marine will be going on another deployment. This is the longest one so far. I swear they keep getting longer. Silly me, they do! I never thought he would deploy this much. It makes me even more worried for when his two years in Japan are up. Slowly, but surely, I'm starting to think he might head to Afghanistan. God I don't want that. I know what I was getting into when going into this relationship. Sometimes it's easy. Other times, it's so hard.

He will be deploying for three months. I can't say when and where for safety reasons. He should have internet access though at times so that makes me happy. I just feel bad because I know these next few months are going to be real hard on him. He has a lot of HARD work coming his way and a very big project. I'm worried for me too though. He'll be gone while I have finals and all and I'm worried that slowly but surely I'm going to start losing all interest in school. I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to give up, because let’s face it: that would be the temporary easy route. I've always been the type of person to have big dreams, but run at the fear of failing. I won't give up. Have to push through this. I would love to cuddle up in my bed until he comes back home, but A. that's not healthy and B. maybe I need to prove to myself that I can be a strong independent woman who can cope with the fact that the love of my life is far away.

I'm rambling...

I think this is all stemming from the fact that I'm sad that he won't be home when we planned. I'm trying to stay positive that he'll be back home soon. I miss him...

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