Things have been going great, but of course things can only be so great for so long. With my two year degree coming to a finish this coming summer, it's time to start looking for colleges so I can get my Bachelors. I kind of just expected Mister to be going to a certain school in the cities, but last night he told me he was thinking of going to school in Iowa or Montana. Say what?! I was completely shocked. I'm not sure what he was thinking because obviously I'm not going to go to school there since I don't live in either of those states. By the time he is out of the service I will have a year of schooling left. That is if I'm on schedule. Once Mister realized this he said the unforgetable words that are engraved in my mind... "Maybe we shouldn't be getting married. Maybe we should wait a few more years."
Those two sentences were a bomb used in my heart. His thing is that we have gone over a year doing long distance and have over a year left of it. The thought of not having to be long distance when he is out of the service is what has been getting him through things. Not knowing where either of us will be and having to spend two years of our marriage apart isn't what either of us wants. I explained to him that he needs to look into schools now, I will start looking into schools and then we'll discuss it and make a decision that both of us are happy with that way we can hopefully get an apartment with each other once he's no longer active duty.
Before I wasn't sure what was going to happen with certain things in my life, but it's been a long time since I've had to wonder what's going to happen with Mister and I. Things were really starting to fall into place and now everything seems to back up in the air again. Until we figure out what schools we're going to, things will continue to be uncertain. One thing I know: I don't want to move out of state. Once I am finished with college, I will have made contacts with companies around here, not in Iowa or Montana. Contacts for me are going to be everything because I'm planning on being a freelancer. It's also important to me that he doesn't settle either and his response was that either way he will be. If he doesnt go to Iowa or Montana, he'll be settling. If he does go and we're long distance, he's settling. That makes me feel horrible. I hope that we both can come to an agreement. Right now he's just as worried and just as disheartend. We'll figure it out though - life is full of twists and turns - just have to learn to get through them.
6 days ago